Hi everyone, hope you are all doing well – today I have another personal blog entry to share with all of you but as the title suggests it is centered around self confidence. I have wanted to blog about this for a while now but recently I was on a train ride with a dear friend of mine (Hi Alisssa! =) and I decided today was the day to let it all out.
Self confidence is a daily struggle and for any woman who says different is lying to themselves and to others. Here is the truth: Every single human being is insecure about something – it may be a list long or simply ONE thing that has plagued them their entire lives. At the core of it, we all share one fundamental thing in common – from the sexiest playboy model to the average working class lady – each of us are bonded by the need to feel ‘confident’. I need to stop for a moment and establish the difference between ‘self-confidence’ and ‘temporary confidence’, you see if you possess a strong sense of self that’s your inner voice speaking to your ego, however if you need to get drunk or wear certain articles of clothing to have others stare and comment on you – that’s NOT self confidence.
In order to gain the point I am trying to make I have to reveal certain elements of my own life I have struggled with – I have actually kept a diary since the age of 12 so I have a strong sense of what I have been ‘dealing/feeling’ for more than 15 years now. The truth of my life is I have always been told I was unattractive – from elementary to high school – this is what individuals decided to throw in my face on a daily basis. I cannot recall one day in high school I wasn’t made fun of for being ‘unattractive’ and I felt such shame about it – I never told my more attractive friends because I didn’t think they would understand. I would hang my head in shame because who could change their face? I used their version of me throughout high school and I always had a negative self image – when boys were interested in me I had no idea as to why? In my eyes my weakness was how I felt, I was always a very good student, I was polite, kind to those around me yet THROUGH MY SMILE I CRIED.
When I entered University I realized how much time I wasted in my life, I had a very transitioned summer that year and I let go of all the ‘wants’ people had of me – herein lies my point: YOU care more about yourself than PEOPLE actually do, so the taunts and the name calling – they have actually forgotten about it years ago but yet you are holding onto it as though it happened YESTERDAY, which is taking time away from your PRESENT LIFE. The way you perceive yourself is vital to a successful life, not just in youth but throughout your entire time here on Earth. You are special, believe it, say it out loud to yourself and do the things that you FEAR the most. For example, I can distinctly remember during my ‘dating years’ before I met my husband, I would always dress nicely on a first date then I would switch it and wear a causal outfit, no makeup, pony tail and had a firm belief that I was THE MOST GORGEOUS WOMAN ON EARTH and if he didn’t think so, then SCREW HIM!
Which brings me to this point: enjoy life in YOUR OWN SKIN, do not let ANYONE take that joy away from you and start believing you are the creator of your own life and most importantly take it day by day because building TRUE self confidence does not happen overnight. It happens when you learn to love yourself the most, care for yourself the most and cherish yourself the most. And do all the things you FEAR, for example: it took courage for me to post my first Youtube video, I was scared to do because a lot of negative things comes with it but it is by far one of the best things I have done to help my self-confidence to date. Now, VERY LITTLE can shake me! And I want each and every one of you beautiful ladies to reach that moment in your lives too!
So do me one small favour, when you read this – tomorrow decide to yourself that, it is Day 1 of infinity that you let go of the pain, struggles and torment others have done to you. Let it be the first day in a long line of days, years, decades to come that you can truly appreciate the beauty of yourself and all others & things around you and I PROMISE YOU that your life will change drastically for the better.
“With realization of one’s own potential and self-confidence in one’s ability,
one can build a better world”.
- Dalai Lama