Hi everyone, hope you are all doing well – today I have another personal blog entry to share with all of you but as the title suggests it is centered around self confidence. I have wanted to blog about this for a while now but recently I was on a train ride with a dear friend of mine (Hi Alisssa! =) and I decided today was the day to let it all out.
Self confidence is a daily struggle and for any woman who says different is lying to themselves and to others. Here is the truth: Every single human being is insecure about something – it may be a list long or simply ONE thing that has plagued them their entire lives. At the core of it, we all share one fundamental thing in common – from the sexiest playboy model to the average working class lady – each of us are bonded by the need to feel ‘confident’. I need to stop for a moment and establish the difference between ‘self-confidence’ and ‘temporary confidence’, you see if you possess a strong sense of self that’s your inner voice speaking to your ego, however if you need to get drunk or wear certain articles of clothing to have others stare and comment on you – that’s NOT self confidence.
In order to gain the point I am trying to make I have to reveal certain elements of my own life I have struggled with – I have actually kept a diary since the age of 12 so I have a strong sense of what I have been ‘dealing/feeling’ for more than 15 years now. The truth of my life is I have always been told I was unattractive – from elementary to high school – this is what individuals decided to throw in my face on a daily basis. I cannot recall one day in high school I wasn’t made fun of for being ‘unattractive’ and I felt such shame about it – I never told my more attractive friends because I didn’t think they would understand. I would hang my head in shame because who could change their face? I used their version of me throughout high school and I always had a negative self image – when boys were interested in me I had no idea as to why? In my eyes my weakness was how I felt, I was always a very good student, I was polite, kind to those around me yet THROUGH MY SMILE I CRIED.
When I entered University I realized how much time I wasted in my life, I had a very transitional summer that year and I let go of all the ‘wants’ people had of me – herein lies my point: YOU care more about yourself than PEOPLE actually do, so the taunts and the name calling – they have actually forgotten about it years ago but yet you are holding onto it as though it happened YESTERDAY, which is taking time away from your PRESENT LIFE. The way you perceive yourself is vital to a successful life, not just in youth but throughout your entire time here on Earth. You are special, believe it, say it out loud to yourself and do the things that you FEAR the most. For example, I would always dress nicely on a first date then I would switch it and wear a causal outfit, no makeup, pony tail and had a firm belief that I was THE MOST GORGEOUS WOMAN ON EARTH and if he didn’t think so, then SCREW HIM!
Which brings me to this point: enjoy life in YOUR OWN SKIN, do not let ANYONE take that joy away from you and start believing you are the creator of your own life and most importantly take it day by day because building TRUE self confidence does not happen overnight. It happens when you learn to love yourself the most, care for yourself the most and cherish yourself the most. And do all the things you FEAR, for example: it took courage for me to post my first Youtube video, I was scared to do because a lot of negative things comes with it but it is by far one of the best things I have done to help my self-confidence to date. Now, VERY LITTLE can shake me! And I want each and every one of you beautiful ladies to reach that moment in your lives too!
So do me one small favour, when you read this – tomorrow decide to yourself that, it is Day 1 of infinity that you let go of the pain, struggles and torment others have done to you. Let it be the first day in a long line of days, years, decades to come that you can truly appreciate the beauty of yourself and all others & things around you and I PROMISE YOU that your life will change drastically for the better.
“With realization of one’s own potential and self-confidence in one’s ability,
one can build a better world”.
Love,
Zenorah
This could advice could not have come at a better time for me. Sometimes our biggest enemy is ourself, but luckily we can also be our greatest saviour. Thank you for your words of wisdom. Tomorrow is Day 1 for me 🙂
P.s. you are beautiful both inside and out!
Hi Yasmin, thank you for your kind words – I am happy you are starting on your journey because it will be a daily battle but always keep your head up and never let others tell you any differently – you are beautiful!!
Thank you for sharing your story. Confidence can come from inside and out: Sometimes I have to trick myself by appearing confident until I start to believe I am. For me it changes day by day and a kind word from someone else can make all the difference. Thank you for the kind words!
Hi hun! i know the feeling, I think we all go through that – which is why i wrote the post because when I talked to my friends about this they always thought I was the most confident person ever, little did they know my internal battles. So I wanted to share some love and honesty with all of you and i am happy you can relate to some of what i posted.
I stare at the monitor because everything that comes to mind as a praise sounds very hollow to me. You have opened your heart here, and for me to say “Your post was wonderful” is really not saying much. So let me just say that a friend of many years came to me a few days ago, admitting her problem of lack of self-confidence and asking for help. I will definitely show her this post and use it to work out her problems. Let me end this by the most heart-felt “Thank you” I have ever said.
You are very sweet, thank you =) I write these things hoping it will help someone, even 1 person and you made my goal a success so THANK YOU!!! hope you are well
I definitely enjoyed reading this post! Thanks for sharing this and it’s always a pleasure to talk with you!! (^_^)
I think I need to book mark this! I’m 32… yet wow still only am just starting to feel that pride in myself, without needing a pat on the back, or validation from others. Not enough though, and not enough to feel that self confidence and bravery you seem to have now! I am trying to be more adventurous and live a little more without feeling like I’d be too embarassed but.. I’ll get there.
Thank you SO much for this post, and for being such a positive person. I’m definitely glad you make videos and we can get to know you through that, and this. Adore you!